Worst Movies Ever: Baby Geniuses (1999)

Excruciating pain; those are the two words that immediately come to mind when I think about Baby Geniuses. Unfortunately, this movie lived up to my expectations; it truly deserves to be called one of the Worst Movies Ever. You have to wonder how all of those involved were actually able to make this film and not immediately know that it was terrible. The story is weak, but the writing, acting, and directing are inexcusable. Ranking number 73 on the bottom 100 of imdb, Baby Geniuses impressed my with its epic failure.

From the beginning of the film, the viewer knows that they have made a poor movie choice. Thankfully that was the point here and it did not happen when I was actually looking for a good film. The funny thing is that even though I fully expected it to be terrible, I did not imagine it being this bad. It was that bad; not even in a fun to laugh at way. I will no longer enjoy the eTrade commercials with the talking baby; this movie has ruined it for me. The basic plot is that babies are all geniuses, but they forget everything once they learn how to talk. Aside from that really not making sense, the characters within the story have little or no depth at all.

The acting was awful from start to finish. I am sure the poor script had a lot to do with the awkward delivery of almost every line, but it was everyone’s fault on this one. Christopher Lloyd proves to be the strongest talent in this one and that is not a good thing to say. It is not that Christopher Lloyd is a bad actor, but in this one it almost felt like he was overcompensating for bad dialogue by over acting his parts. Then, it would seem that Lloyd realized how bad the film was going half way through and decided to no longer be in the film with speaking roles. He has much more dialogue on the front end of the film that the back end, but who could really blame him for giving up on an obviously failing movie.

If you are looking for a bad to mediocre film to watch this Friday, do not pick up Baby Geniuses. It does not even live up to that. It would be hard to believe that anyone could actually enjoy this one in fact. It is a far far cry from Bob Clark’s earlier work A Christmas Story which proved to win a special place in many hearts since its release in 1983. Possibly the biggest tragedy is that Bob Clark’s last film was Baby Geniuses 2 which ranked even worse on the bottom 100 movies on imdb. At least he can always be remembered for Porky’s and A Christmas Story. And in case you were wondering, we will not be reviewing Baby Geniuses 2; I do not think I could sit through another film like this one.

The Skinny Version

Raw Score: 187,313
Sharon Movie? No

Director: Bob Clark
Writer: Steven Paul (story) and
Francisca Matos (story)
Genre: Comedy/Crime/Family/Sci-Fi

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